The day for us typically starts at around 7:30. John is up and out of the house generally before the sun even comes up, but he is always very quiet and we never even hear him. As soon as we get up we go in to the living room and I turn on cartoons while I am making breakfast. A normal breakfast for us is a scrambled egg with some fresh fruit. If I am feeling lazy then we have oatmeal or cereal. After breakfast I clean the dishes and start any laundry that needs to be done or folded. I then run around the house and swish the toilets, and make the beds. I jump in the shower shortly after that while Brinley is picking up her toys in her room and where ever else the might have migrated over the last several hours.
As soon as I finish getting us ready for the day we jump in the car and head to the Park. I take a picnic most days since we stay there for a couple of hours. After we eat, we leave and head to the store if we need anything. I normally call Tara on my way home and have her meet us at our house. We like to hang out most days and I really enjoy the company. When we get home I try to put Miss Brin down for a nap and I start prepping for dinner while Tara and I chat. Our afternoons tend to fly by. I am very thankful to Tara for that. She helps me occupy my child and gives me the adult interaction that I so desperately need.
3 days a week we work on Phonics for about an hour. She is getting very good. She can visually recognize A-F and recognize 1-10. She can also spell her name and read small words. Not many, but a few. She can read ‘toy’, ‘Brinley’, ‘cat’, ‘dog’, and ‘Dora’.
John walks in the door almost religiously at 5pm. We love dinner time in our house. We only have an hour with John but we make the best of it. Every evening starts off with a dance party. John will turn on my computer with an online radio station or put on a Glee CD and we just rock out while dinner finishes cooking. We love it. Brinley is a little dancing queen. She begs for us to dance if we don’t remember to do it. I think she looks forward to it more than anyone. It makes my heart sing to see Brinley giggle with delight while John swings her around the kitchen.
After dinner is done and we take off our dancing shoes, we head to the living room for family time. Since John cannot be home at bed time, we do our family prayer, scripture study and singing time before he heads back to school. When he leaves Brinley melts down. It is getting easier but she still misses her daddy. I think she does not understand why he can’t stay home after dinner like he used to. I put cartoons back on so that I clean up from dinner. We have a rule in our house that we don’t go to bed with dishes in the sink. I have a hard time following that rule a lot of days but for the most part I am pretty good about it.
After the kitchen is clean and closed down for the night I put Brinley in the bath tub. Bath time is both stressful and one of my favorite times. I love it because it gives me a chance to really connect with Brinley and talk to her about our day and listen to her tell me how she is feeling. It is stressful because she is terrified of water getting anywhere near her head. I try to rush through shampooing and conditioner but by the time we are done she is so hysterical that she just wants to get out and cuddle in her bed. After we pick out pj’s and she gets water in a sippy cup she climbs in her bed with books.
We use a book number system for positive reinforcement during the day. I got the idea from my sister Erika. Since Brinley loves books so much I use them as a reward system. Depending on how she behaves during the day depends on how many books we read at night together. I take books away for bad behavior and add them when she is good. The max is 10 books. Her books are still very short so I can manage 10. The great thing is, is that most nights she gets 10 books. She is very good during the day and I only have to threaten to take a book away and she stops what ever she is doing. I have to say that I am very happy that we decided to disciple this way.
John and I felt very strongly about not physically punishing Brinley. She is our baby and we both feel that laying your hand on your child in any manner is abuse. I know a lot of people do not agree with that, and that is fine. No jugement here. That is why we are free to parent how we choose to. Before we had Brinley we saw how people would spank, use hot sauce, soap, cold showers, scream, yell, and put them behind closed doors. We also noticed how it was breaking the spirits of their children. We made a commitment to each other and to our future children that we would figure out a constructive disciplining plan that would positively reinforce good behavior and teach when things were not appropriate. We have read so many books, gotten advice ( A lot of it from my sisters. They are all amazing mothers and I really admire them.), and talked to pediatricians and child physcologists. We feel that we have come up with a good method an intend to use it with the next baby ( this is not an announcement. I wish, but it is not.) After we read our books, I tuck Brinley in and turn on a 10 minute cartoon like Thomas or an episode of Max and Ruby. By the time I come back in to check on her and turn off her show she is already zonked out.
I finish up the evening by turning down our bed and folding any laundry that needs to be done while I catch up on my shows with the DVR. I then return phone calls and catch up on emails. I also like to read before I go to bed. Some nights I can manage to stay awake till John gets home, but most nights I am asleep. Then the day starts all over again. I have to say that I love our routine. I also love when we have things that mess it up. We love to go to Knoxville, to play dates, to friends’ houses, the mall, the zoo, and I love our girls’ nights. And of course, when we are in NA visiting family we can just throw it out the window – but those are things that make life grand!
